Ipsy: November 2013

Sweet Photo skills of Jzim

If I were publicly posting "things I'm thankful for" on social media for this month, I would be thankful for Ipsy. This month was by far the absolute greatest; but yes it's still your $10 and you can bitch if you want to. I'm aware. We're all aware. Onto the review:

 For each product you will see my own opinion and underneath that you will see "Reasons to Bitch." Reasons to Bitch is all inspired and generated from what others are bitching about on message boards.

Em Michelle Phan: Pillow Plush Cushiony Lip Balm: Berries- Amazing. Achieving the perfect "wine-stained" lip without looking like a lame attempt at the gothic lifestyle is not an easy task. Michelle Phan finally put out the perfect balm in the greatest of all colors.

Reasons to Bitch

• "I didn't get the color I wanted! WAH!"
• "I don't like how I have to get my whittle finger all messy to apply this."

Be a Bombshell: Lip Crayon: Hot Damn- Who doesn't love a bright red lipstick? I'll tell you who: Twats. Twats don't love bright red lipsticks, but whores do. I can't get enough of this. I kind of wish I still was into the party scene because this Lip Crayon is killer.

Reasons to Bitch

• "RED! I'm not a harlot! Why do you keep sending me this timeless, classic color?"
• "I don't wear lipstick and I'm too greedy to give this or trade it away."

Nailtini: Straight Up Color Nail Laquer: Champagne- Ipsy loves Nailtini. We get it every other month. Luckily, this month we were sent a classy, low-key color. The consistency and overall application is pretty high. I might just look forward to our next Nailtini in 'January.'

Reasons to Bitch

• "I have yet to learn my fine motor skills and apply polish like a toddler."
• "I don't classify polish as 'makeup' and I except more for my $10."

TRESemme TRES Two Extra Hold Hairspray- I changed up my profile specifically to get the hairspray. If this were the 80s, I'd have the huge can in my fanny-pack. Although this isn't a lux product, it's still a great spray and an affordable one at that.  

Reasons to Bitch

• "Oh Em Gee. I got this and I'm an irate 'Ipster.' I'll just spam the Ipsy FB page to let the community know of my distaste...repeatedly."
• "I would never use a drug store hair product, because I'm a snooty cow-bag."

Pixie Beauty: Bronzer: Subtly Suntouched- Pixie is a top-runner in my cosmetic line of favorites. Unfortunately, this bronzer is only on the average side. It's fair, but the pigmentation is only so-so.

Reasons to Bitch

• "Why were we sent a bronzer in November? My small brain doesn't comprehend-o."
• "I already have a 'healthy glow' of radiation from the tanning salon. No thank you, Pixie."

Starlooks Gem Eye Pencil: Topaz- Metallic eye-liners need to make a serious comeback, because this color is insane. I love it, but it's not a "quick trip to Wal-Mart color." As far as pigmentation and application, this pencil doesn't disappoint.

Reasons to Bitch

• I'm a sassy, outspoken curmudgeon and will neverrrrr wear this color to the office."
• "I only use mechanical liners and cannot be bothered with the 2-second sharpening process."

Overall, Ipsy killed it. However, they kind of set themselves up for December, because everyone has unrealistically high expectations. This now will become the "month to beat," and I'll be impressed if they can.

Grade: A+

Pop Sugar Must Have: November 2013

Sweet Photo-skills of Jzim



Pop Sugar certainly gave a lot to be thankful for, with this months box. With mostly high-marks from the critical cynics, Pop Sugar saved themselves a headache, after recently increasing their prices. Onto the review:

For each product you will see my own opinion and underneath that you will see "Reasons to Bitch." Reasons to Bitch is all inspired and generated from what others are bitching about on message boards.

Michael Stars Wrap- This wrap alone makes the whole box worth it. I'm not a typical scarf kind of gal, but I can't wait to wear this as much and as often as I can. The pattern is so gorgeous and it is super soft. Long story short: I look phenomenal in this. Win. Win & win.

Reasons to Bitch

• "I'm stylistically-challenged and I don't know how to wear scarves."
• "I don't like the pattern and now want to write Pop Sugar mean letters expressing this."

Illume Candle: Naughty- "Spicy wooded scent" makes up this naughty candle that lasts a grand total of 35 hours. I am in love with this candle and couldn't be happier with the masculine scent.  

Reasons to Bitch

• "Candles emit such harmful toxins and smog into the environment and I'm one of those really weird people that complain about things like this."
• "I have such a sensitive little nose and this makes me all stuffy and sad."

Lands' End Single Canvas Wine Tote- I strictly like to drink out of a paper bag, but I wouldn't mind the upgrade. I'm just joking...I still like the paper bag. This tote is so well made and can be embroidered. Perhaps you know somebody that strangely loves monograms...and drinking.

Reasons to Bitch

• "I have no idea how to or what to use this for."
• "I'm a former alcoholic. Thanks for the reminder, Pop Sugar."

Maison De Monaco: Strawberry & Blackcurrant Cream Preserves- I have never in my life put anything better than this in my mouth. There has been some steep competition, but Masison De Monaco prevails. The scent, flavor and consistency all work in an incredibly delicious way. Yum.  

Reasons to Bitch

• "I strictly buy preserve-free jellies and this is useless to me."
• "This is made with alcohol and that completely compromises my morale's."

The Soap & Paper Factory: Roland Pine Shea Butter Soap- Scented bar soap is more of a novelty than anything, simply because you can't really use it anywhere other than your hands. I, however, enjoy the pine scent so perhaps I'll stop resenting hand-washing...for at least a little while.

Reasons to Bitch

• "I washed my lady parts with this soap and now I need to make a trip to my gyno."
• "I still can't forgive the 'Paper Factory' for sending out those hideous paper coasters, (which I use each and every day since receiving them.)"

Absolute! Nail Polish Remover Pads: Peach- The good: These are the tiniest, cutest and perfectly purse-sized nail polish pads. The bad: They smell like peach-booze. They are horribly oily and they only clean about 2 nails per pad. I appreciate the concept, but there is a reason that they retail for $2 per pack. 
 
Reasons to Bitch

• "They removed all of my polish, and then stained my fingers."
• "The oil from the pads stained my clothes AND broke my heart."  

Canvaspop Gift Card: $30- With the exclusion of having to pay for shipping & handling, this gift card is pretty fantastic. Once I find a canvas-worthy photo, I'll gladly pay for shipping. An 8x10, unframed canvas is a flat $30. Very cool.

Reasons to Bitch

• "I refuse to pay for shipping and I'm angry that Pop Sugar put me in this situation."
• "Photography has met the digital age and nobody prints out pictures anymore."

Barefruit Crunchy Sea Salt Caramel Apple Chips- How delicious does this sound? Not only is the packaging attractive, but these are super low in calorie. What's not to love, right? These are hideous. They do not taste like apples, or caramel, or chips, or even salt. 100% natural, 100% nasty.

Reasons to Bitch

• "I took these to work for a healthy snack alternative and I about died from the awfulness."
• "I can buy these at the gas station and that to me...just isn't luxury."

Overall, this month was incredible. Hopefully this becomes a trend, but alas...we all know that this is never the case.

Grade: A+

Blush Mystery Beauty Box- November 2013

Sweet Photo-skills of Jzim

November, the month where we all pretend that we're happy and "thankful" for all of the "blessings" in our lives. Well, this is only relevant if you're publicly bragging on Facebook to make yourself look a little less like a wanker. However, in the world of beauty subs, thankful...is a word you'll never hear. Onto the review:

For each product you will see my own opinion and underneath that you will see "Reasons to Bitch." Reasons to Bitch is all inspired and generated from what others are bitching about on message boards.

Cargo High Pigment Pencil: Brown- This is the perfect pencil for achieving a professional look without looking overly made-up. Application is fairly decent, but nothing to really rave about. I'll use this pencil when I have to look alert for those horrible 6am work shifts.
 

Reasons to Bitch:

         - "This isn't a mechanical liner and I actually have to sharpen this pencil."
         - "Brown is such a boring, poop color and my peepers deserve the best."

Nick Chavez Horsetail Root Lifting Spray- Horsetail Root Extract is a large plant with hollow stems, primarily used for medicinal purposes. I was hoping that this was the case and it wasn't from an actual horse's tail. This spray smells so much like alcohol and would be the worst to use after a drinking binge. Overall, this product is alright. It kind of seems like it was a lame attempt at a lifting spray.   

Reasons to Bitch:

        - "My hair is already full, thick and gorgeous."
        - "I'm still concerned that this is from an actual horse's tail and that is not okay with me."

Pur-Lisse Pur Perfect Essential Daily Moisturizer- Oh, how I enjoy moisturizers. Psyche, no I don't. What I do find exciting about this is that it's a 30spf sunscreen as well. At least that one day of the year when I go outside, I'll be covered.

Reasons to Bitch:

        - "I already have too many tubes of this from other beauty subs."
        - "I never use sun-screen, because a tan is worth the health risk."

Anstastia Mini Hydrafull Gloss: Sorbet- How I would have loved for this to be full-sized...even trial-sized would have been nice. This gloss is half of the size of my pointer finger. No exaggeration. The color is phenomenal, but the applicator tip is a plastic paddle. I hope this isn't the new trend for lip applicators, as I am seeing it pop up everywhere. This gloss is great...just a mini-baby gloss.

Reasons to Bitch:

         - "This is such a bright neon color and I would never wear this shade for the Fall season."
         - "This is so small; it got lost in my pocket."

Smart FX Smartlash Enhancer- My lackluster, short lashes has officially given me a complex. I begged my eye doctor for lash help and he just laughed at me. I told him that I was losing friends because of my short-lashes. He did not believe me. After several weeks of usage, I'll be able to give more than a past life-memory for a review.  

Reasons to Bitch:

         - "I already have gorgeous Disney Princess lashes."
         - "What if I love this and have to repurchase it at the retail price?!"

--> While searching for Smartlash Enhancer reviews, it seems like all  of the fantastic reviews on certain websites may be part of a consumer scam. Not saying that the product is harmful, but more of a false advertisement. That's the general buzz on the inter-web, but relying on another persons opinion isn't exactly how you should live your life, but that's just my opinion.  

Paula’s Choice RESIST Ultra-Light Super Antioxidant Concentrate Serum- Another, "You're getting old" serum. I don't have wrinkles. Perhaps it's because I'm still in my 20s or the fact that I keep using all of these bizarre serums sent my way.

Reasons to Bitch:
             
          - "How many more skin care items are there in this world?"
          - "I have super-sensitive skin, but I'll use this and complain anyways!"

Elizabeth Arden Beautiful Color Maximum Volume Mascara: Black- As far as mascaras go, this one is pretty average. The brush is average, the application is average and the color is...what was it? Oh, average. Mascara has come a long way, but I guess we were sent one that was created in the 80s.

Reasons to Bitch:

          - "The tube has a sticker on it saying, "Gift-not for resale," and that's tacky."
          -  "I needed another black mascara like another hole in my head."

Overall, I'm not exactly high-fiving everyone around me, but I'm not immensely disappointed either.

 

Grade C: Needs improvement.

 

Glossybox & Byrdie: October 2013 Review

Sweet Photo Skills of Jzim

 

The eagerly awaited Glossybox, collaborated with Byrdie arrived early this morning. In the wee hours of 10:30 am, I awoke to my mailman beating down my door. Awake and disoriented, I decided to find out, if in fact, the bird is the word.

For each product you will see my own opinion and underneath that you will see "Reasons to Bitch." Reasons to Bitch is all inspired and generated from what others are bitching about on message boards.

Balance Me Shine on Tinted Lip Salve: Super Soft Beige - As happy as I was to receive a lip product, I was slightly less than excited that it was a salve. When applied, there is literally no visible color and it smells like spearmint. The salve is ultra smoothing and moisturizing, so it does deliver...but it's not anywhere near the quality that I look for.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "The color doesn't last long at all, or even show up for that matter."
• "It smells like spearmint, which reminds me of Freedent and that's a turn-off."

BVLGARI: Eau Parfumee Au The Vert De Cologne- Every woman should own at least one BVLGARI perfume. Not only is the bottle design sleek and classy, but the scent is so glamorous that even an ugly girl can feel pretty. This particular scent has a summery, feminine vibe that I can't get enough of.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "There isn't a spritzer on it and my man hands will get the perfume everywhere."
• "I have no idea how to pronounce the name so how will I tell my lover what to get me?"

Fresh: Lotus Youth Preserve Face Cream- When Charlie Brown goes Trick-or-treating and everybody gets candy and Charlie gets a rock...well that is how I feel about Face Creams. "I got a rock." With that said, I actually like this face cream. It was smooth and served as a great foundation for the rest of my make-up. Retailing at $42 for a full-size version, I didn't expect it to disappoint.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "It kind of smells like an organic garden and that's too weird for me."
• "I have way too many moisturizers and old people creams."

Sesha: Renu Exfoliating Gel- This product is so gross, that it is absolutely incredible. After you cleanse your face and your skin is completely dry, you rub this lubricant like gel on your face and watch it cling to your dead skin cells. The dead skin cells then roll up and peel off your face. I mean this is vile, horrible, awful and the absolute highlight of my day. An absolute must-have.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "I had to take several tums after using this product, because it upset my stomach from the gross-factor."
• "It kind of looked like sperm, but didn't smell like it though."

Tarte: Lights, Camera, Flashes Statement Mascara- I had such high hopes for this "statement" mascara, because my little lashes are less than impressive. If applied correctly, this mascara does it all. It takes a bit of time, but the outcome is insane. The packaging is adorable and the product is scientifically proven. I can now see my lashes when I half close my eyes. A++

Reasons to Bitch:

• "I already have long lushes lashes and I don't see the point in this."
• "This didn't do anything for me, because I failed to read the instructions."

Overall, the bird, bird, bird really is the word.

A+ Glossybox, A+

Ipsy: October 2013 Review

Sweet Photo Skills of Jzim

After sending and posting relentless, irate letters to Ipsy, UPS and DHL, my bag FINALLY came. I mean,  I had to wait until mid-month, like Ipsy promised us from the very beginning. Oh, wait...I didn't do any of that, because I'm not a ball-sack. Onto the review:

Theme: The Art of Beauty

For each product you will see my own opinion and underneath that you will see "Reasons to Bitch." Reasons to Bitch is all inspired and generated from what others are bitching about on message boards.

Buxom Full-on Lip Polish: Dolly- Buxom is a prestige cosmetic line and well sought after for their remarkable products. I had high expectations for this gloss and after the pain of the lip-plumping misery went away, I liked it. The initial sting was quite awful and rather shocking. Several hours later, I could still feel the sting, BUT my lips were fuller. The color is a nice neutral, but this is a gloss with a vengeance.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "Ipsy clearly hates me, because I didn't get this gloss."
• "For $10, I should have received the full-size, in addition to the 4 other products."
• "This is more of a 'little girl pink,' and I'm a full-on twat-face. I would prefer a darker shade."

Nourish Organic Body Lotion: Coconut & Argan- The smooth, moisturizing texture doesn't disappoint, however...the slight scent of vanilla does. Wah. Some woman are all about the "Organic" qualities of beauty products which this lotion offers. I, however, enjoy littering and wrecking havoc on our planet, so it's wasted on me. Relax, that was a joke.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "The packaging looks like it's from the 80s and that isn't ok for my modern lifestyle."
• "I think Organic products are over-rated."
• "You can find this a Target, but I'd rather go to Walmart, so I can wear my pajama pants."

Ole Henriksen: Truth Serum Collagen Booster- Excellent skin care is the best foundation for your face full of makeup...including those awful anti-aging products. Ole Henriksen Truth Serum claims to reduce fine lines, brighten and protect from environmental aggressors. Slightly citrusy, fast-absorbing and non-greasy, Ole Henriksen just might do the trick for my frown lines.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "I frown way too much for this product to be of help."
• "I really wanted this and feel outraged that I missed out on it."
• "I signed up for make-up, not skin care."

Sexy Hair: Blow Dry Gel- The 'Sexy Hair,' line is an absolute favorite of mine. I have yet to use a product that gave less than stellar results. A little goes a long way for this product. You only need about a dime-size worth of gel to get a complete blow-out effect. Well done, Sexy Hair, well done.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "Um, this isn't the 90s...and I'm not going for a glamour shoot. Big hair need not apply."
• "I have a really outdated hair style and I'd like to keep it that way."
• "I already have voluptuous hair and I don't want to take additional time to style it."

Zoya Nail Polish: Mason- Fall 2013 nails are sure to look stunning with Zoya's new polish line. This polish is easy to apply due to the consistency of the product and is relatively long-lasting.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "I hate the color that I received so much, that I cannot even give this a fair rating."
• "My 12 year old daughter wears blues, purples and greens. I'm too crotchety for that."
• "Another nail polish? I didn't even finish that last bottle..."

Overall, my bag was great...thankfully so! If not, I was going to have to write additional hate mail and post it on every forum I know of. I was then going to teach my kids that, Bitching and harassing a company is the ONLY way to get results. Good thing I like my bag...but there's always next month.

Click to Sign Up & Bitch

Rating: A

Pop Sugar Must Have: October 2013 Review

Sweet Photo Skills of Jzim

 

The much anticipated Popsugar Must Have has arrived and the bitch-fest is at an all time high.

For each product you will see my own opinion and underneath that you will see "Reasons to Bitch." Reasons to Bitch is all inspired and generated from what others are bitching about on message boards

The Can't Cook Book: Recipes for the Absolutely Terrified- It's quite refreshing to find a cookbook that doesn't offer up bizarre recipes with never-before-heard-of ingredients. The recipes give the illusion of a high-end meal, but really it's all a façade. Luckily, general idiots can apply this book to their lives and give the mac & cheese a break.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "I already know how to cook, and well at that!" (That's great! What restaurant do you own?)
• "I'd much prefer a boring novel that only I would like."
• "I find it completely sexist that you'd send a cook book to a group of women."

NYX Cosmetics Liquid Liner: black- For a liquid liner, this one isn't all too amazing. In order to achieve the perfect line, this requires some skill and patience. The drying time is lengthy and the brush is a bit flimsy. If you don't know how to apply liquid liner, this one isn't going to help you learn.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "NYX, you sent me NYX!"
• "This is from a big-box store and I am highly insulted."
• "How many more black liners am I going to be sent?"

Smokey Shadow Palette- The classic smokey eye is timeless, gorgeous and an overall challenge for most women. These color are decently pigmented and on-trend for the fall.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "I don't wear eye shadow."
• "This palette was only $7 and certainly not a must-have."
• "I already have too much shadow and Popsugar should have consulted with me first!" 

Gorjana Charity Bali Bead Bracelet- This bracelet is teensy and cute. It would look great stacked with other bracelets for a bright, fun look. The downside is that it is extremely short in length and not very sturdy. Coincidently, my bracelet broke...but I just tied it up again...

Reasons to Bitch:

• "I would NEVER pay $45 for this bracelet" (News flash: You didn't)
• "I don't like the color pink and can't appreciate that it's for breast cancer awareness."
• "More Gorjana and gold...have you not been reading our relentless hate mail?"

Julep Polish Coco and Polymer Duo- Julep polish is high-quality steadily gaining popularity within the beauty community. Coco is the perfect blunt red for the fall and the Polymer top coat is an added bonus.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "I just bought the Polymer and I will never again in my life need another top coat."
• "I only get professional manicures and pedicures. Who actually paints their own nails?"
• "I am so bad at painting my own nails!"

Jane Tran Bobby Pins- This is more of a hair "barrette" than a bobby pin. The shimmery-fall colors are great and are perfect for a refined up-do.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "Only children and dancers use bobby-pins."
• "How are $12 bobby-pins considered a luxury item?"
• "I never use bobby-pins and I am content with my outdated hairstyle. "

The Wet Brush- Upon receiving the Wet Brush, I checked out the reviews and embarrassingly enough, ended up watching videos on YouTube of girls brushing their hair. Along with thinking that my life was at an all-time low; I thought that these girls were insane. Who knew that brushing your hair was such a big issue? The Wet Brush is incredible, but I don't want to ruin your surprise OR prevent you from watching people brush their hair on YouTube.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "I don't like pink and still haven't figured out that it's for breast cancer awareness."
• "I'm more of a comb kind of girl"
• "I saw this at the local store and refuse to use this, because I'm a pretentious bitch."

The Crispery: Halloween Crispycake- I just ate this whole thing, basically by myself and I now feel like I am going to die of consumption. It was good, but I'm in such a state of misery from the over-indulgence that I'm getting nauseous from thinking about it. Overall rating for the cake...B. Not B+

Reasons to Bitch:

• "I don't believe in, or celebrate Halloween, so thanks for sending me the devil's treat."
• "Rice Crispy treats are for poor people"
• I completely agree with this bitch-ling that has been circulating around online. I can't tell you how many times I've gone to the local store to buy rice crispy ingredients and thought, "all of these damn poor people have already bought up the ingredients, leaving nothing left for the rich people." So, I took things into my own hands and wrote the marshmallow and rice-crispy company asking them, NO...demanding them to raise their prices to prevent the "poor people," from making these delicious treats.
• "I didn't share my rice crispy treat and now I have the worst upset stomach"

Stitch Fix $20 Gift Card (Special Extra)- I love a good gift card, but this "special extra" has started an official Popsugar war. I look forward to trying the service, but sadly it's sized-biased, preventing a lot of women service. If you're above a size 14, Stitch Fix tells you that you're out of luck and supposedly refuses you service. That's mean. Once I receive my first "fix," I'll blog it up.

Reasons to Bitch:

• "Stitch Fix is a dick and refused me service." (Not Cool)
• "I only shop in-store."
• "This sounds a bit too pricey and not for the people that can only afford to make Rice Crispy treats."

Overall, this box was most likely curated for me. I appreciate the fun mix of beauty, style and food...a total gem. Next month, Popsugar raises their price by a near $5...and the bitchfest, well...we will just have the watch it all play out.

Click to Sign up and Bitch!

Birchbox: October 2013 Review

Sweet Photo Skills of Jzim

 

Birchbox is on fire this month with timely shipping, impressive product "samples," and over-the-top customer service, but don't worry...bitches are still bitching.

For each product you will see my own opinion and underneath that you will see "Reasons to Bitch." Reasons to Bitch is all inspired and generated from what others are bitching about on message boards

Theme: Beauty Buzz

Benefit Cosmetics: Fake Up- I was pleasantly surprised to find a Benefit product in my box, because I never get sent them. I just figured Benefit was "anti-Jamie," and didn't want to play with me. "Fake-up" is a brilliant concept where it moisturizes, conceals and gives the appearance that you're ready to tackle the day. The packaging is adorable and it really works, a total must-have.

Reasons to Bitch

• "I don't fake anything Benefit, just orgasms, I fake those."
• "The sample is just too small and I deserve a full-size product."
• "I don't have dark circles and simply don't know any other woman that does."

Liz Earle: Cleanse & Polish Hot Cloth Cleanser- Such a huge sample, beautifully packaged. After reading the instructions I scrubbed up and immediately fell in love with this cleanser. The smooth texture of the polish leaves the skin feeling alive, awake and clean. Another A+

Reasons to Bitch

• "I already have a cleanser that I use and would never dare to update my preferences."
• "This product smells like medicine."
• "I don't like how it requires a special cloth to use effectively."

Liz Earle: Pure Muslin Cloth- Part two of the Liz Earle Cleanse & Polish. In addition to the polish, this cloth seals the deal. My skin feels unbelievable and it's because of this slightly course cleansing cloth.

Reasons to Bitch

• "You counted this as one of my samples, so I'm going to write mean letters on the BB Facebook page."
• "I only use hypo-allergenic materials on my sensitive face."
• "I have to wash this cloth? Thanks for the extra chore, Liz."

Pop Beauty Aqua Lacquer: Flowery Fuchsia- Pop Beauty hasn't been a favorite of mine, but they may have just redeemed themselves. This gloss is slightly minty with a versatile feminine color. The only downside is that the applicator...is a "paddle." Definitely not so easy for a quick application in a crowded-club scene.

Reasons to Bitch

• "I poked myself in the eye with the applicator paddle."
• "This gloss makes me feel like a pre-teen and I'm a sassy-outspoken, blue-hair."
• "Pop Beauty makes those awful Pouty Pop Crayons, and I can't forgive them for that."

ChapStick Moisturizer Hydration Lock: Vanilla Crème- If I was trapped on a desert island and could only take 3 things, ChapStick would be one of them. The scent is 'wah' to me, but it's more of a cake-vanilla, rather than warm-vanilla. Ultra-moisturizing and lip-smoothing, ChapStick, I'm in love.

Reasons to Bitch

• "My bitch girl-friends and I didn't sign up to receive ChapStick."
• "I never use ChapStick and I'm content with my alligator lips."
• "I twisted up my ChapStick and now it won't go back down."

Overall, Birchbox is aiming high and setting their sights on regaining their subscription crown.

A+ Birchbox

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