Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Blush Mystery Beauty Box: January 2014

Sweet Photo Skills by Jzim
Blush Mystery Beauty box has arrived and it strangely seems as if it was curated by someone on crack... Onto the review:

For each product you will see my own opinion and underneath that you will see "Reasons to Bitch." Reasons to Bitch is all inspired and generated from what others are bitching about on message boards.

LeEdge Skin Exfoliator- After a stressful day, I like to unwind by dragging a dull blade across my body to relax. Thankfully LeEdge has come to the rescue. Really, what is that? Scrapping off dead skin with a dull blade? Was this needed? Am I that scaly? I slid this down my arm without being in the shower and that was painful. I then gave it a try in the shower and that just felt like an extremely ineffective shave. Overall, my skin felt...violated.

Reasons to Bitch
  • "This is on-sale on Amazon and for me, that devalues the entire content of the box."
  • "LeEdge increases suicidal ideation and that's a big no-no."
Jane Iredale: Just Kissed Lip Plumber: Tokyo- Slightly tingly, pleasantly colored, strawberry scented lipstick, this would be a phenomenal find if it was full-sized. The color goes on much lighter than it looks and it doesn't dry out your lips.

Reasons to Bitch
  • "This lipstick is rounded at the tip and it doesn't shape by lips like it should."
  • "The sample was too small considering it was the ONLY makeup product in the box."
Osmosis Skincare Harmonized Water Digestive Health- I would like to believe in gimmicks like quick-fix products...but this one yields zero results, negative or positive. The 'trick,' if you will, is to add 2ml to a glass of water and drink twice daily. Then over time your skin will improve and so will your insides. After we decode the bullshit, it is easy to see that you just added extra glasses of water to your diet. Water improves skin and overall health...not a $30 bottle of "Harmonized Water."

Reasons to Bitch
  • "This isn't something that should even be included in a beauty box. It's a dietary aide."
  • "You can keep your voodoo away from me. There's only one water that can cleanse me."
Goldfaden Md: Wake Up Call- I am neither pleased, nor displeased with this product. It's a facial rejuvenator that I'm hesitant to try due to the harsh wintery conditions. There aren't many reviews on this product and with such sensitive skin, I'm not looking to experiment at this time.

Reasons to Bitch
  • "What an expensive price-tag for a full size bottle. OMG, no thanks."
  • "I already have an extensive skin-care routine and I'm not about to introduce a new product."

Klorane Leave-In Cream with Desert Date- The spicy scent reminds me of the cologne that my creepy study-hall teacher wore when he would stand over me and uncomfortably rub my shoulders. Other than awakening that re-pressed memory, Klorane Leave-In Cream leaves me feeling incredible. My hair is smooth, manageable and light. Trip to the guidance counselor, not needed. A+

Reasons to Bitch
  • "Leave-In creams leave my hair greasy and my heart, sad."
  • "I really want the hair mask that some others received. This is so my luck."

Gytone Hydrating Eye Cream- Scentless and slightly tingly this Hydrating Eye Cream has me hooked. Sleepless nights are quickly concealed with this hydrating formula.

[Edit 2/20/2014] I like this product very much, but I'm allergic to it. If I only put it under my eye, no reaction...near my brow bone, well...let's just not go there.

Reasons to Bitch
  • "I accidently got this in my eyes and the burning pain was unbelievable."
  • "I don't use eye-creams, because I'm a Botox type of gal."
Overall, there were some hidden gems in this box...but it certainly could have used some improvement.

Grade: E for Effort. Sometimes, creativity just isn't appreciated.